
The food stylist’s food porn.
For us, McDonalds goes hand in hand with long car trips. It’s firmly entrenched as a family tradition and is just the enticement the kids need to KEEP IT TOGETHER on those long haul car trips. Like the other day, when we drove from Tenterfield to Newcastle. Turned out that Armidale was just the perfect time for a Maccas lunch.
Are you shocked that I feed my kids McDonalds? Usually it’s a twice a year treat, but so far this year, they’ve already eaten it three times. And I don’t really care. I don’t like the concept of taboo foods. I’d prefer to raise food-savvy kids, educated and able to enjoy everything without guilt. They just need to learn how often they should eat certain things.
Do you know parents who say, “We NEVER feed our kids fast food”? Such smugness bugs me. It’s right up there with those parents who also survive wonderfully without TVs and video games, who never yell at their kids or have a bad parenting moment. I’ve never mastered such parenting perfection. My kids and I live in the real world full of temptations and things that are bad for us. If I keep those lures magically out of reach, I can only imagine the rebellion, when as teens they can take their own money and scoff as many burgers as they want.
Did my kids enjoy their McDonalds cuisine? Not really (they prefer my nuggets which are apparently tastier) and part of me is always happy when we get to the end and the kids haven’t really been into it. Except for the toy. They always love the crappy toy.
Feeling brave, I ordered a sweet chilli chicken wrap. Safe to say that it was disgusting. All oozy and inedible. Have you noticed the current trend for fast-food ooze? The final food shot in all the ads has burgers and wraps oozing sauce. Looks gross to me, but it must be popular, so I’m jumping on the bandwagon, oozing away with my own version of a sweet chilli chicken wrap. Of course mine has pumpkin, spring onion and bamboo shoots in it, which means that it actually tastes good, too.
Thai style chicken chilli wraps
500g chicken mince
1 1/2 cups breadcrumbs, (I make fresh ones from stale bread)
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 tsp lemon grass (or lemon rind)
4 spring onions
225g can bamboo shoots, rinsed, drained
1 cup grated pumpkin
1 egg, lightly whisked
2 tbsp sweet chilli sauce
1 tbsp fish sauce
0-2 tbsp Thai red curry paste (NOTE: To appease everyone in my household, I skip the paste, to keep them blander for Miss F – then I add extra toppings in the wraps for adults. But if your whole family likes spice then add in some paste – it’s yum.)
To serve: Store bought wraps of your choice, spinach leaves, grated carrot, coriander, sweet chilli sauce.
Preheat the oven to 180C. Line two baking trays with baking paper.
Pop the mince into a large mixing bowl.
Use a mini food processor to whizz up the breadcrumbs, garlic and lemon grass/rind. Tip into the bowl.
Blitz the spring onion, add to the bowl and repeat with the bamboo shoots. Also add in the pumpkin (you can blitz it, but I actually prefer the texture of it grated) and the egg and all the sauces/pastes.
Wear kitchen gloves and use your hands to combine everything really well. Note that the mixture is SLOPPY! It will firm up during cooking. Form small patties, or long ‘chicken tender’ shapes and place on the tray.
Spray with cooking oil and bake for 20 minutes. Remove and carefully turn over. Spray with more oil and cook for another 15-20 minutes until cooked through (break one open and check that the mince is no longer pink).
Serve with salad on wraps, with an extra dollop of sweet chilli sauce and lashings of coriander for the adults.
Serves 2 adults and 3 kids.

USE LEFTOVERS THE NEXT DAY… make a lunch salad with bits of chicken patties, spinach, carrot, fennel, avocado, sesame seeds and a sprinkle of brown vinegar – I just ate it and IT WAS DELICIOUS.
