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My domestic sham EXPOSED!

February 8, 2011 · Filed under All recipes, Food experiences, News, Sweets & treats · Tagged cooking techniques, feeding the family, recipe, treats

A boon for modern housewifery, a recipe that relies on rotting ingredients.

Each year, Australians throw away $516 billion worth of food. That averages out to $616 per household. Usually I’m conscientious about this, but lately I’ve had to contend with THE ANTS.

In the last week THE ANTS have invaded and forced me to throw away brown sugar, 5 packets of pineapple/sultanas, flaked almonds, an olive loaf and 3 peaches (they were INSIDE!) They’re even into the peanut butter (we’re now just picking out the dead ones and plowing on regardless). No amount of vacumming, tidying, spraying, drowning or baits is getting rid of them.

They are making me feel like a slovenly housewife. They trail past, mocking my cleaning and trying to steal my ingredients.

And you see, it took a bit of coercing to convince my best-friend that I’d be better off working from home (for less money) and looking after everyone. We’d always been a strictly 50/50 feminist arrangement and shifting to more traditional roles was always going to be tricky for everyone. The new arrangement has been going well for a year now but these ANTS are giving me bad press. It’s depressing.

So let’s cheer ourselves up with cake. And let’s call it ‘bread’ to make ourselves feel less weak-willed. I know that none of us are under any delusions that banana ‘bread’ is healthy. It’s full of butter. But sometimes you just need sweets and if you do, then ease your conscience with a tonne of bananas, dates and walnuts (which are apparently, one of the best plant sources of protein).

Even better, this recipe is actually a congratulations to all of you fellow slovenly housewives who have allowed your bananas to droop and brown. A friend (and master baker) confided recently that the secret to her ‘bread’ was to wait until the bananas are practically liquid. There are not many ingredients and recipes that require you to be quite so domestically impeded. Enjoy.

(The best) banana bread

1½ cups self-raising flour
½ cup brown sugar, firmly packed
½ cup dates, chopped
½ cup walnuts, chopped
100g butter, melted
2 eggs, beaten
4 over-ripe bananas, mashed

Preheat the oven to 180C. Grease a 14x20cm loaf tin and line the bottom with baking paper.

Sift the flour into a large mixing bowl. Stir through the sugar, dates and walnuts.

Pour over the butter and mix through. Add the eggs and mashed banana. Mix until combined (don’t overmix).

Spoon into the loaf tin. Bake for about 50-55 minutes until a skewer comes out clean (cover with foil if it starts to brown too much around the 40 minute mark).

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The fine art of heatwave cookery

February 2, 2011 · Filed under All recipes, Food experiences, News

Hot. Cranky. And don't get me started on all the ants.

It was 33 degrees in my bedroom at 10pm last night and I do not have air-conditioning.

I am unimpressed about this.

With Cyclone Yasi bearing down up north, I wouldn’t dream of whinging about my relatively calm (just hot) situation. In private though, I will admit to a fair bit of cranky behaviour. Actually, very cranky behaviour. Cranky to the point that the kids are keeping well clear unless they are needing a bottom-wipe or are desperate enough to pester for an iceblock.

I’ve been speculating that this is what menopause feels like. Three years of a humid, sticky February. Perhaps one of my more mature readers can confirm or (hopefully) deny this scary theory.

So, while appetites are generally down, I do feel the need to feed my children something at the end of the day, but what? When the food becomes limp on the journey from fridge to bench and there’s no way you’re turning on the oven or hotplate, what are you going to eat?

Vegie-smuggling salads are a tricky area (one I’m working on), but luckily my kids are becoming much better with basic salad ingredients and I can feed them raw carrot, cucumber, grape tomatoes and iceberg lettuce. Tonight I’m planning a little salad & fruit platter. With a bowl of homous to dip into, some smoked salmon for the luxury-loving Miss Fruitarian and a bit of ham for Mr Meat & Potatoes. A couple of slices of bread and I’m done.

Last night I turned on the hotplate long enough to cook some store-bought tortellini (yes, I know, they’re not very healthy), and I tossed them into raw, finely diced tomatoes, capsicum and marinated artichokes. (You can also use my barely-cook, make-ahead tomato sauce.) I sprinkled over crumbled feta and ham for the kids and some olives and basil for my best-friend and me.

Later in the week I’ll tackle guacamole & salsa rolled up in wraps and tuna & corn mini-pizzas under the grill.

You can opt for chopped salad vegies mixed through cottage cheese and stuffed into pita breads, or if desperate, BBQ chicken (remove the skin) and coleslaw rolls.

That’s about all my addled, cranky brain can come up with. If we all pitch in, we’ll have enough ideas to get us through to March. Please feel free to share what’s on the heatwave menu at your place…

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Tackling the ‘L’ word

January 27, 2011 · Filed under All recipes, Food experiences, News · Tagged feeding the family, kids, lunchbox, parenting, recipe

Dig through the plastics drawer and find that lid.

This morning, Miss Fruitarian spent quite some time explaining her extensive knowledge of cussing. All Year Ones (which she insists on being called even though it isn’t official until Monday) know that the ‘f’ word is fart, the ‘b’ word is bum and the ‘g’ word is god.

For me, the word that makes me the most uncomfortable is the ‘L’ word…. Lunchbox.

Like a scary movie, the l-word is back, along with homework, morning deadlines and the need to get your washing schedule planned so that you have enough clean uniforms to make it through the week (yes, I should just buy the extra tunic and save myself the hassle).

Despite all the myths and expectations, I hate lunchboxes as much as every other mother in the country. They are a pain, particularly when you attend a teeny-tiny school with no canteen to fall back on. I’ve been paying keen attention to all the ideas in the media (particularly The Healthy Food Guide which also features a Vegie Smugglers excerpt this month) and it seems the same 10 ideas get shifted around and nuanced each January. Simple sandwiches (roll into pinwheels or use cookie cutters to make them cute), foods – apparently that start with ‘c’ – in sticks (cheese, carrot, capsicum, cucumber), the odd melon ball, dried fruit, savoury muffins and home-made muesli bars. Older kids can tackle a yoghurt. Avoid fruit juice. Freeze stuff in summer.

For mornings where you are motivated, you could try some of these combinations…

Beetroot dip/grated carrot/roast beef
Poached chicken/avocado/lemon
Canned tuna in springwater/corn kernels/cottage cheese
Ham/swiss cheese/pesto

So many ideas to make lunchtime fun. But so many ways to feel disappointed in yourself when for the 14th time in a row you pack a ham and cheese sandwich (crusts on, cut into two), a store-bought muesli bar and a bunch of grapes.

This is real-life, folks, nothing glossy. None of us have time so don’t sweat it. Particularly since the kids don’t care. They want the same boring whatever as what’s in their bestie’s box and they’re so busy talking they won’t eat most of it anyway. Then they’ll be off to run about like lunatics and play ‘dance school’ or (my favourite) ‘slap bottom’ and lunch won’t even be vaguely remembered.

The moral to my rant is to give them a good breakfast, healthy and varied dinners, lots of fruit for snacks and forget about the rest. Lunchbox stress is just another area where mothers are made to feel guilty. Do your best and then relax.

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“Mummy you’re in the magazine!”

January 20, 2011 · Filed under News · Tagged kids, parenting

Vegie Smugglers article in super food ideas magazine

Can't be the mummy from OUR house...

Generally I try to avoid the supermarket with the kids as much as possible, but during the holidays have little choice but to drag them along. So the other day in between the bananas and checkout I showed them the ‘Vegie Smugglers’ blurb in Super Food Ideas. Massive squeals of excitement burst forth from Miss F and Mr M&P. They were so surprised to see me in a magazine that they caused a huge ruckus. ‘ssshhhhhh!!!!!’, I panicked, feeling like the Sally Field character in Soapdish, as if I’d set the whole scene up for a bit of supermarket glory.

But I have to admit that their excitement was cute. Especially since they think their mum is a bit of a layabout.

“Why don’t you work, mummy?” they ask as I place dinner down at the end of a day of shopping, cooking, photographing, illustrating, ironing, tidying, organising, publishing, cleaning and sticking bandaids on children.

Wryly, I grit my teeth, “Mummy works [slaves] at home”. I resist the 2-hour diatribe on the struggles of work/life balance, unsatisfying part-time work, unpaid labour and the demands of two little children.

It brought home that you can never win in this mothering malarky. The choice to work at home may have been primarily made to advantage them, but my career sacrifice will be lost on them (as it should be, it’s my choice after all).

Why such a malingering mum is in a major food magazine is lost on them too. In their minds it must just be a happy coincidence.

Perhaps they will try to figure that one out in a few years time.

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“Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in”

January 18, 2011 · Filed under All recipes, Food experiences, News, Vegetarian, Vegie smuggling techniques · Tagged feeding the family, kids, parenting, vegies

Can you place the quote? That’s right! This week I am channelling Michael Corleone in the Godfather Part III. Why? A family blood-feud? No, just that these words were squealed (with an edge of small child hysteria) at my dinner table last week;

“Mummy, is this ONION?, you know I don’t like ONION!”.

What, little child!?! You don’t like onion? Since when??? Onion has been liberally used throughout most of our meals for the past few years, but suddenly this week, it is being identified and picked out of everything. Then with a face screwed up in disgust, the child is smearing half chewed chunks over the table and turning a peaceful family meal into a battle scene.

Just when I thought I was on the home straight of Vegie-Smuggling I realise that I still have many years of food fads to go.

What to do when these phases hit?
1. Keep calm. Don’t inflame the situation by arguing, particularly if you have one of those argumentative little lovelies who enjoy nothing more than a battle.
2. Stay in charge. Try to get your kids to eat it all up, assertively reminding them that they’ve eaten it before and loved it before.
3. Serve a similar dish again within a few days. See if the aversion was a once-off, or something you are going to have to deal with.

If it’s a definite new food problem, head back to your vegie-smuggling basics. If you’ve been cooking with nice big chunks of the culprit veg, go back to grating it for a while, or replace with a variation. For me, grating the onion or replacing it with spring onion has been enough to keep the last couple of nights calm (and the dinners still tasty).

Within a week or two, just go back to normal. Your lovely fickle offspring will (hopefully) have forgotten all about it. Kids are good like that. Unlike the Corleones.

This was my first vegie-smuggling recipe!

Cheesy Pots

This recipe is one I return to again and again as a fail-proof dinner that smuggles nearly anything.

2½ cups of any fresh vegetables, chopped super-fine or grated. I use peas, broccoli, cauliflower, zucchini, carrot and canned corn.
50g ham, diced (optional)

Cheese sauce
40g butter
2 tbsp plain flour
1½ cups milk, warmed
125g cheddar cheese, grated
Salt & black pepper

Preheat oven to 180C.
Microwave or steam each of the vegies separately until just starting to soften. Mix them together with ham, if using, and distribute evenly among overproof dishes.

For the cheese sauce, heat the butter in a non-stick saucepan over low-medium heat. Add the flour and use a wooden spoon to stir for 2 minutes. Gradually add the warm milk. It is important to do it gradually and stir constantly. The mixture will thicken into a paste before smoothing back out into a glossy sauce.

Bring sauce to the boil, remove from the heat and add the cheese. Stir until melted. Season to taste.

Divide sauce evenly among the ovenproof dishes. Place on an oven tray and bake for 25-30 minutes until bubbling and golden.

MAKES 5 CUPS (divide between ovenproof dishes to suit your family).

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Grow your own…

January 10, 2011 · Filed under Food experiences, News, Vegie smuggling techniques

Yes indeedy, I GREW these beauties...

I have an admission. While I competently know my way around vegetables in the kitchen… I can’t grow them to save myself. My thumb is far more brown than green (no poo jokes please). Which is a shame since growing your own food is a fantastic way for kids to learn all about healthy eating.

But I do try to make Stephanie Alexander proud. My main problem is that being an urbanite, I’m only growing stuff in pots. Which is a good excuse for failure, but doesn’t justify my ‘gardening flightiness’ as my husband puts it. I just think plants are so damn unforgiving. I lose interest for just a couple of hot days, return outside and find it all dead. Luckily they’ve just renovated my local supermarket.

Still, even the crappiest of us can grow SOMETHING. And seeing the kid’s interest in it makes the effort worthwhile. My kids now know the difference between a wide range of herbs. They love to pick the cherry tomatoes, and this year, with impressive tenacity I’ve managed to grow the eggplants pictured above. Aren’t they pretty? I chopped them up this morning for a new eggplant lasagne recipe I’m working on.

And here is my most glorious strawberry of the season. Perhaps I should have used this in my strawberry muffin recipe (which you can find in the cookbook), but I preferred a far more noble use – dropped in last night’s glass of bubbles. I toasted the plant and the summer and swept up in my success, started planning my winter crop.

Destined for something noble – my champagne glass

If you are keen to get gardening, try out these inspiring gardening resources; Stephanie Alexander’s kitchen garden foundation, Grow your own food (thanks Paula on facebook for this suggestion), www.gardenate.com/ has a stack of great information which can be adapted to your location and it’s hard to go past the ABC gardening website, which has everything you could ever need to know. Get the kids involved and good luck – may your thumbs be less brown than mine.

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More Vegie Smuggling success!

January 6, 2011 · Filed under News, Vegie smuggling techniques · Tagged feeding the family, kids, success, vegies

As we all know, I love nothing more than a vegie smuggling success story. Without sounding like a goodie-two-shoes (whatever that phrase means), I really do enjoy hearing that this website is helping parents improve their kid’s (and their) diets. For some folks, any small victory in the ongoing mealtime war is MAJOR. I remember how miserable endless food stand-offs can be, and how exciting it is when you find a dinner-time winner.

So here’s some feedback from Leah, who got in touch via vegiesmugglers@gmail.com.

Zucchini and smiles (and an IKEA plate, of course!)

“We were having a hard time getting our kids to finish eating dinner, most nights dragging it out for over an hour. Then I found your awesome blog and made the Salmon & Zucchini bites (which I served with salad) and I couldn’t believe it, 10 minutes and dinner was over! The easiest dinner I’ve ever made and delicious as well. Both my kids, 3 & 5 absolutely loved helping make them and eating them too. Thanks for sharing your fantastic recipes with us and making dinner fun again.”

If you’ve had a good experience with one of my recipes, make sure you let me know…

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January 4. Time to put the chocolate DOWN

January 4, 2011 · Filed under All recipes, Chicken, News, Vegie smuggling techniques · Tagged chicken, Christmas, feeding the family, recipe, vegetables

How much chocolate, how many chips and how many glasses of wine have you had since mid-December? I’ve no idea either, but I do know that it’s been A LOT. Daily, in fact. Whilst I’ve still been getting good quantities of fruit into the kids, and some vegies, a large amount of sugar, salt and fat has been passing their lips too. And now, with the work year back underway, it’s time to stop.

The first few days back on track are difficult. I know at 4pm today, my fingers will be itching for chips and my thirst for wine will be difficult to ignore. After dinner I’ll be digging through the cupboards to see if maybe there’s just one piece of something a bit naughty left… (there’s not)

Best news is that within a few days I’ll be starting to feel much, much better. My energy will return, the kids will settle down, and the world will be a shinier, happier place. And I’ll remember why it is that I love eating well and why I bother trying to get so many vegetables into my children.

Start your detox gently, with this chicken & pasta soup. It’s satisfying enough to fill our overstretched tummies, but the flavours are clean and there’s a good hit of vegies. Best of all, it works well for the whole family. Blend it up for baby food, drain off most of the liquid for the smaller kids. Leave as is for the rest of the kids and the adults can add generous amounts of parsley, pepper and parmesan.

vegie smugglers chicken pasta and vegetable soup

My kind of detox – pasta, chicken and bacon amongst the vegies…

Chicken, vegie & pasta soup

1 tbsp olive oil
500g chicken thigh fillets, fat trimmed, sliced into thin pieces
100g bacon, diced
1 onion, finely diced
1 potato, peeled, finely diced
1 swede, peeled, finely diced
1 large carrot, peeled, finely diced
1 zucchini, finely diced
½ cup finely diced celery
3 tbsp chopped herbs of your choice (choose any combination of basil, parsley, oregano and chives)
6 cups chicken stock
1 cup frozen peas
¾ cup risoni
Salt & black pepper

Crusty bread, to serve

Heat olive oil in a large saucepan over medium-high heat. Cook the chicken for 4-5 minutes until browned. Remove from pan and set aside.

In the same saucepan, cook the bacon and onion, stirring often, for 5 minutes until onion is soft.

Add the diced vegies and cook for another 7-8 minutes, stirring often to avoid sticking.
Mix through the herbs, then add the stock and bring to the boil. Reduce heat to low, cover and simmer for 10 minutes. Add the chicken, peas and pasta and cook for 8-10 minutes until pasta is cooked. Season to taste.

Serve in bowls with crusty bread. Try topping soup with chopped parsley and grated parmesan.

SERVES 2 ADULTS & 2 KIDS

Like this recipe? Check out my cookbooks to find a bunch more meals that your family will love.

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New year, new choices

January 1, 2011 · Filed under News

Do I mummy, take you, children, for another year?

And another year dawns. No hangover this year. Actually I’ve already been up, played tennis and eaten a bacon & egg sarnie from the bbq (with avocado, of course). January 1st does feel surprisingly ‘new’, doesn’t it? Almost a relief, after the void between Christmas and New Year’s Eve.

I’m not too keen on those few days, finding the down time too existential. I end up examining my life in detail, deciding what’s working, what’s not and what my goals are for the coming year. My brain always ends up hurting (or that could be all the wine!).

Still, it’s always nice to have some family down-time. After a few days adrift with all the extended family, I realised that the kids were voluntarily returning to me. Wanting to show me stuff, share stories and get cuddles. It’s nice, after a big busy year of being thrust together, without space, to realise how much we actually do love each other.

It makes me realise how nice choice is. So often life seems choice-less – just stuck in years of parental servitude. The big decisions were locked in years ago (how many kids, will I work, where to live etc). My choices now come in the smaller decisions I make each day. Will I try to smuggle in a bit more zucchini. Will I keep my voice lowered? Will I find 5 minutes to stop and just cuddle them? Will I play with them in the park, or just sit and check my facebook!

I suspect the ‘lack of choice’ feeling is why so many marriages fail. The Christian ‘till death do us part’ seems so lovely and committed on your wedding day, but a little more daunting a few years in. There’s a nice Wiccan tradition where each year you sit and talk honestly with your partner about if you’d like to recommit for the coming year (and a day). You decide whether you reckon you’ve got another 366 days left in the relationship. It’s amazing how when you break it down like that, usually you do. And actually you’re quite looking forward to it.

Shame that we can’t do that same two-way conversation with the kids. I suspect that mine would happily tell me to bugger off, that they’ll look after themselves. I can see their little minds dreaming of days in their pyjamas and 8 straight hours of TV.

So perhaps there isn’t really much choice – but I can still reset my thinking and prepare for another year of effort, frustration, failures, successes and love. It’s an exhausting job, being a good parent, but one that fills my heart like no-other.

I reckon I’m up for one more year.

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“Mummy, do scientists believe in Santa?”

December 13, 2010 · Filed under Craft for non-crafty parents, News

It's been a long year, but we're almost there!

At just six, Miss Fruitarian’s days of belief in the great man are numbered. The schoolyard is abuzz with rumours of parental involvement. Even more shocking was the discovery that Christmas has a purpose other than toys. Miss F announced after scripture last week that actually “Jesus is the best gift”. I asked if perhaps we should ask Santa to bring a big fat stocking full of Our Saviour? No, she’d prefer the Sylvanian Family of fluffy cats.

Not that the kids really deserve anything. That moment of perfection from a few weeks ago is long gone. Replaced with end of year exhaustion that sees every day ending in tears and most mornings starting with whinging and sibling bickering. Mr Meat & Potatoes is foul too. He has a maniacal grin and glazed eyes from 6am, when he starts prodding, poking and sitting on his sister until she cracks it (about 6.15am).

I’m remembering now how last year also ended up like this. Weeks of foul children, hyped with special events, treats and late nights – still rewarded on Christmas morning with present after present. It doesn’t seem quite right. A little boy at school was apparently so naughty last December that Santa only brought him a big bag of sticks (I’m dying to know what his crime was). All hail the diligent parent committed to justice enough to see this threat through. The scene must have been chaos. Although in the same situation, Mr M&P would probably have been pretty happy so long as one or two were shaped like guns.

So, in a week or two it will all be over. Things will calm down and we’ll relax into a month of swimming and iceblocks. Until then, drag yourself forward to each party/event/concert/shopping trip. Perhaps I’ll see you there. I’ll be the haggard woman, slightly hungover and snapping at my bickering children. Oh wait, is that me, or is that you?

As a thanks to you all for your visits here, and your purchases of the cookbook I’ve made you some free gift tags – just print out this PDF. There are different styles for all the different members of the family. And if you haven’t already, remember that the Vegie Smugglers Cookbook is a perfect gift, and if ordered before Friday Dec 17, should reach you pre-Christmas.